Personal style and you: Where is the focus on developing soul beauty?

For as long as I have been alive, the subject of personal style has always been present.

We are bombarded with images in magazines, billboards, and television commercials. Apparently everywhere we go, we are being asked (whether directly or indirectly) what is your personal style?

Personal style is a combination or how you carry yourself, what you wear, and the message that you’re trying to send the world. However, the part of personal style that often gets left out, is who you are on the inside. While ad agencies tend to focus on a person’s outward appearance, there is not much focus on cultivating who you are as a person.

“The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It’s the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows & the beauty of a woman only grows with passing years.”

— Audrey Hepburn

Taking care of yourself, both physically and mentally, is a sign that you respect yourself. Developing your own personal style is an even deeper reflection of your identity. Who are you? What is the message that you’re trying to send? Keep in mind, the first thing that people see, is you! However, the next thing that people will notice is how you act.

Personal style really comes from within.

Have you ever met an outwardly beautiful man or woman? Only to realize that their beauty became tainted once you started having a conversation and realized that they were totally self-involved? Vanity can be a person’s greatest downfall. While the outward appearance may attract, I don’t care how handsome or beautiful you are physically, if the inner workings of your mind are selfish, vain, or just unkind, the attractiveness will fade.

“The only real elegance is in the mind; if you’ve got that, the rest really comes from it.”

Diana Vreeland

Much like the persona (on the blog yesterday)-the outward ‘mask’ that you show the world-developing your own personal style is relative to developing yourself as an individual and examining who you are when no one else is around. Not only does personal style manifest itself in the way you dress, it comes from within. Who you are on the inside whether you want to believe it or not, radiates from you.

Every person puts out energies to the world. If yours is negative, hateful, or conversely, positive and upbeat—believe me, people pick up on it. Just like we are able to consciously choose happiness, we are definitely able to consciously choose our personal style.

I liken personal styles to how a therapist works with his or her clients. Many people ask me, what’s your style in session? I like to tell them that I’m tactfully and compassionately direct. I’m not a loud person by nature so usually my observations about a client’s problems in session are delivered in a quiet, meaningful way. I’m not saying that my style would work with everyone! Some people prefer a brasher more abrasive manner where they are “whipped into shape” and told exactly what they need to do.

Think about it.

If someone asked you what your personal interaction style was, what would you tell them?

Do you find your personal style to be effective?

What do you think that the way you carry yourself, dress, and interact says about you?

“Be sure what you want and be sure about yourself. Fashion is not just beauty, it’s about good attitude. You have to believe in yourself and be strong.”

— Adriana Lima

Walk tall, embrace your style, and smile.

Wishing you health, happiness and soulful personal style everyday,

 Rachel Ann



appearances and introductions

I find the most interesting people to be the ones that don’t fit a particular mold, but are instead a mixed bag of surprises. You know, the people that you subconsciously judge because they look a certain way, or maybe you just fight some unknown reflex to dislike them… sometimes first impressions can be off, and perhaps it’s insecurity attempting to rear it’s urgly, yes I said urgly, little head. I’ve been guilty of attempting to sum a person up after one interaction while also been on the other end of the spectrum where I’ve felt prematurely judged—which I’m sure you could easily speak to an experience that you’ve had in your own life. If I could only tell you how many times I’ve been told that “You don’t act like I thought you would,” you would probably be intrigued enough to want to meet me yourself to see if you felt the same way! So a little about me in case you were wondering and I began to go too far off into a tangential diatribe about appearances…

I’m a licensed mental health therapist in two states, currently working as a children’s mental health therapist, getting ready to join a group private practice, and am selling my original artwork in a local shop in my downtown community. Most recently, I begrudgingly set up an Etsy account ( ) to help further display my art to the public (I only say begrudgingly because I just voluntarily added another semi-time consuming activity to my plate although I take full responsibility! ; )-but really, if you paint, draw, craft, whatever and you want a venue to sell your work-Etsy is a wonderful community to be a part of! Tons of unique creations in just about every genre you could imagine-and maybe some that you have never thought of! This world we live in really is a vast vacuum of opportunity although when you’re first starting out, it can seem slightly overwhelming on how you’ll be noticed…

Which brought me to the bloglife. I’m getting started on this blogging adventure to share some life lessons I’ve already acquired at my ripe young old-soul age of 30! Daily musings as I call them. Analytical observations about love, relationships, jobs, person to person interactions, children, and family that I’ve accrued over the years and I know can be of value to you. I want to help encourage you and create a sense of universality of experience, a concept from Irvin Yalom, one of my favorite group theorists who advocated that sharing experiences with others allows you to become connected with them because you realize that you’re not the only one! A beautiful idea, really-the idea that sharing our experiences can bring us closer and even normalize life from one person to another.  My dream would to be to have an interactive experience, one where you feel comfortable commenting and eventually I could jump into some consulting ventures-if I can ever be of assistance to you or your company on self-image, self-respect, relationship issues, and how to deal with conflict, please contact me at My husband calls me a hard charger and a Renaissance woman-ha! He’s my biggest fan and has always encouraged all of my ventures (every woman that chooses to be in a relationship ideally needs her partner to be her number one supporter-I’ll be writing about this in the future so check back!). When I told him I wanted to write a blog, he matter of fact stated, “If that’s what you want to do, do it.”

And so here I am.


Rachel Ann